Agreeing or Disagreeing ≠ Listening

When Roger James and I teach listening skills, we ask people to look at a list of “non-listening behaviors.” The list includes thirteen actions including the usual culprits of interrupting, advising or persuading, and pseudo-questions (“Don’t you think that…?”) When we ask people if there are any surprises on the list they invariably ask why “agreeing or disagreeing” is on the list of non-listening behaviors. Here’s why. When you listen you are trying to understand … Read more…